86'n It

As the end draws near this second and final time I will be pregnant, I've had some moments of reflection. Mostly on how amazing it really is to grow a life.


Right now this baby is just a bump. She's some kicks and punches. She's bouts of heartburn and a list of possible baby names. But in a few short days she will be a person. A little being in my arms who will grow up. She will have a first kiss, be late to class, pick a career, and probably have some unfortunate hairstyles along the way.

I have these moments of parenthood with Franca too. When you can tell something clicks with her, when you see her whispering and playing out scenes with Dora and her Star Wars figures. She is this whole other person separate from us, but somehow we made her.

That was the thought I had this evening when the four of us lounged on the couch. Me trying to get comfortable, Franca using her future baby sister as a pillow and Marc snuggling in.

We did this. We made this life.

And not only this new life that is about to join our family, but also we made this entire life. Two crazy architecture students in Tucson started dating and now we have this house and these girls. It is amazing the things that can happen if you just say "Take me to lunch", "Let's by this dilapidated house!", "Let's have a baby", and "Let's have another baby." One day you are twelve years old daydreaming about being a grown-up, and the next you are a married mortgage-holder pregnant with your second daughter. Life. Just like that.

Someday this baby (who is currently kicking the edge of the desk through my skin) will make her own decisions and create her own life. I know it is all "duh, circle of life" sort of stuff, but when it is actually happening in your life (and in your ramshackle house) it takes on this "is this real?", "I can't possibly be allowed to do this" mystical feeling.

Strangers ask me often now when I'm due. They always seemed shocked when I say just a few days. At first they get this look of panic like they might have to help deliver a baby right there in the Christmas clearance aisle at Target. This look almost always turns into the sweetest smile with a little twinkle behind it. It is almost like they get what I'm feeling. I have this new life inside my belly just waiting to begin. Standing right here next to the 70% off Justin Bieber wrapping paper. Life is crazy.

We smile and realize a new life will soon join us. A new path will soon begin, separate but irrevocably intertwined with my own.